After a long week of soul-searching, I’ve realized that I’ve made a terrible mistake. This entire website has been an exercise in futility and I’m going to pack it in.
I’ve realized that it truly is impossible to fight against the forces of conservatism and ignorance. They are just too strong. They have talk radio and major news outlets and they can scream really loudly. And that scares me. I don’t want people to think I’m a baby-killing pagan communist anymore.
To that end, I will do the only rational thing. I will shut up. For good.
This website will stand as a monument to my stupidity and hubris. How could I have thought for a second that I could make a difference?!
I should apologize to Glenn Beck for years of mocking him and thinking he was insane for thinking there was some vast conspiracy at work. There has to be. It makes perfect sense that he alone would have the vision to put together this web of lies that are ruling our lives.
I’d like to apologize to the American Right Wing. I know you guys just want to make sure others can’t worship or lives their lives as they see fit, so I think you should just go ahead and do that. It’s exhausting hearing you.
I was going to post a video of this, but I’m going to just write it.
Gay rights, or rights in general, are of concern to every single one of us. Not just the gay community. If we say that we can deny rights to one group of people based on what makes a few people feel icky, then it opens the floodgates to a LOT of oppression.
I’ve seen four general arguments against gay marriage in the last few days, and, quite frankly, they’re fraking stupid.
Gay marriage is against the Bible.
You know what else is against the Bible?
Not stoning your children when they disobey
Marrying a non-virgin
Touching the skin of a pig
Not paying government dues (taxes)
There. Done. End of story. Stop cherry-picking.
If men can marry men and women can marry women, soon, people will be able to marry turtles, dogs, cats, children, or multiple people.
Marriage, in the legal definition, is a social contract between two people. Two gay adults are legally capable of giving consent for such an action. A dog, turtle, or child cannot do this. As for polygamy? If the adults are all fine with it, I actually have little reason to deny something like this. Of course, this might create a few legal knots.
Marriage has always been between one man and one woman.
False. Marriage has been MOSTLY within one man and one woman. However, various cultures have had some form of what we would today call gay marriage. Even in the 19th century, what we might call romantic gay relationships were not uncommon or even frowned upon.
The Bible itself has various definitions of what constitutes marriage and what is acceptable. Nearly none of these definitions would be socially acceptable today. A lot of things in the Bible were meant for another time, and many people pick and choose which ones they don’t like. Again, see the first entry. Or this article.
Gay marriage will ruin America (children will suffer/ families will crumble/ blah blah blah)
Oh, I’m sorry. Is that like how giving everyone votings rights made white people’s voting rights matter less? Or how freeing the slaves made freedom less valuable since no more people had it?
Shut up, you marriage hipster.
Children from gay couples actually do quite well. The reason they have it hard? Bigots make it hard for them. But you’re right. They should just not tell anyone about their parents. And gay couples shouldn’t have children. Families, after all are sacred. That’s why we make sure that couples that want to get married can have children and are stable before they procreate, right?
The Right lost the culture wars. That’s it. Suck it up, move along, or get left behind. If you don’t, there are some lovely areas of the American Southwest where you can establish your own little cult.
Caiden Cowger explained his views on homosexuality, why he thinks it’s immoral, and the injustice of not being able to preach to homosexuals. He capped it off this week by explaining why he believes homosexuals are evil and yet he himself does not hate them, just the sin.
He sounds like a bigot three times his age. Let’s break this down.
The public and legal vows for eternal love are only for straight people who have a 50% chance of getting divorced anyway.
May 17, 2012
Maybe it’s me. Maybe I don’t get the big deal about wanting to ban gay marriage. If a gay couple wishes to get married and live together, how does that undermine my own coming marriage or the marriages of everyone else? I’ve bene doing some thinking and I have a few questions to everyone who opposes gay marriage or is otherwise against LGBT individuals having rights or being able to express themselves in the public forum. If you can answer these questions, you win. It’s that simple. And they’re not trick questions.
If you believe the Bible dictates we must shun homosexuality because it is a sin, should we also shun divorcees, people who eat shellfish, and people who do not worship in a Judeo-Christian way?
Much of the core argument against gay rights in any way, shape, or form, comes from Judeo-Christian readings of the Bible. It clearly states in Leviticus 20:13 that man lying with man is an abomination.
Of course, as I pointed out last year, there are other things in the Bible we seem to not pay attention to even though they are clearly commandments: paying taxes, not tattooing, wearing gold, etc. The problem with this justification is that it doesn’t hold up to scrutiny. It’d be like police arresting everyone who jaywalked but ignoring murders and rapists and focusing on only a single law.
Either enforce ALL the laws in the Bible or admit you’re cherry-picking.
If pro-LGBT groups wanting marriage for these individuals have declared “war” on traditional marriage, does that mean that North Carolina redefining marriage rights for a very narrow segment of the population is a war on heterosexual couples as well?
Buzzfeed put together a great list of all the consequences of passing Amendment 1. It’s not just that it takes rights from gay couples. It also takes rights away from ANY couple that is not married. Medical and financial decisions, for example, may now only be made by married individuals for another person. Likewise, domestic abuse laws no longer apply unless the couple is married. Oh, and domestic partner insurance benefits? Those are gone, too.
This is like when Texas was in such a haste to ban gay marriage that it banned marriage IN GENERAL. That’s right. North Carolina has taken rights away from straight couples, too, kind of like a doctor trying to remove a tumor with a shotgun. Straight couples will suffer and be discriminated against because of Amendment 1.
If the whole point of Amendment 1 in North Carolina was to protect traditional marriage but you can still marry your first cousin, does that mean we now consider marrying your first cousin is “traditional” and morally right?
There’s a Deliverance joke in there. Nothing more to say. Moving on…
If people who are pro-gay rights are “demonizing” so-called traditional marriage by disagreeing with it, does this mean that Christians are “demonizing” Jews by claiming the Messiah has already come?
This one is part of the conservative attack plan on gay rights. If someone wants gay marriage, then that person must therefore think people who believe in “traditional” marriage are monsters.
Well, yes and no.
Playing the victim is not an argument. Being upset or shocked that someone has the gall to disagree with you and acting all butt-hurt because you’ve been called out for bigoted views is not evidence that you are correct. For example…
Mother: “Steve, eat your vegetables while Mommy drinks her special water.”
Steve: “But Mom, isn’t that your third glass of vodka… this hour?”
Mother: “How dare you!? Are you saying I’m a drunkard? Just because you’re twelve and don’t rink you think I’m wrong?”
See the similarity. Being hurt someone disagrees with you is not an argument. End of story.
If Bristol Palin truly believes traditional marriage is the only way to raise children, why did she engage in behavior that led her to her teen pregnancy and why didn’t she stay with her baby’s father?
Bristol Palin was quite vocal in her disbelief that the President of the United States would endorse gay marriage. She endorses the view that only a mother-father family is good for raising kids.
I’m sorry, but isn’t she the most famous case of out-of-wedlock teenage motherhood in the last… however long we’ve been caring about this? Bristol Palin could not believe President Obama saw the need to speak to his children about gay marriage and would endorse it in order to expand their world view.
Maybe it’s me, but her saying traditional marriage is the only way to raise a kid stinks of hypocrisy. After all, if she truly believes that, she would have married her kid’s dad at the first opportunity.
If you are against gay marriage because you believe it will force citizens to be gay or invalidate straight marriage, do you actually understand the law?
Pat Buchanan is the perfect example of how the Right sees gay marriage. In their minds, making gay marriage legal will invalidate straight marriage because gay marriage will now be the norm? He also does a nice job of showing the fake outrage at being called out for being bigoted I mentioned earlier. You really have to see this to admire how Buchannan manages to stuff nearly everything I’ve talked about until this point
You got all that? He can’t believe someone would say we’ve been wrong up until this point. He can’t believe someone is challenging marriage. The only rational way gay marriage will invalidate straight marriage is if it supersedes it. Which is NOT the plan.
Following that logic, does that mean almost half of America is gay?
You don’t have to be part of a group to advocate for that group, but the Right can’t seem to grasp this. Obama reaches out to Europe? He must be a socialist. He wants good relations with Muslim countries? He must be a Muslim! He supports gay marriage? He must be gay!
That’s weird. I support feminism but am not a woman. I support gay rights but am straight. I support welfare and social safety nets for the less fortunate yet haven’t been in those situations myself. Am I a gay unwed mother?
No, I am a Hispanic straight male. And one that has empathy, something the Right seems to forget exists.
There you have it. If homophobes and everyone against LGBT rights can answer these questions in satisfying manner, if they can justify the cognitive dissonance inherent in making these arguments, then they win.
They can have all the straight marriage they want. And… go!
And now, let’s enjoy some levity by listening to Ahnold’s greatest hits. Remixed!
Not pictured? Evil secular people who want to overthrow Christianity by practicing their own beliefs in private. MONSTERS!
May 8, 2012
I think I’m starting to realize that a lot of religious people seem to be confusing “religious persecution” with “I’m not the center of the universe.” Case in point…
A school in Lenoir City, Tennessee has found itself in some controversy. Atheist students have complained that it’s very difficult being a non-believer in a school where teachers and students are encouraged to pray and Judeo-Christian worldviews are expected of everyone. Obviously, a place so entrenched in religious fundamentalism would not be a comfortable environment for… well, anyone who was not Christian. Did I mention this was in the context of a public school?
Well, as you can imagine, the fine folks at Lenoir City saw right through these heathens’ plot. By asking to be treated as equals and for the First Amendment to be enforced in a public building, they were obviously looking to ban Christianity from the world.
A public institution cannot show preference to any single belief system. That means government bodies, schools, and others cannot make religious practices part of their official policy. However, individual members can still practice their religion as long as they don’t encroach on the rights of others to practice, or not practice at all, whatever they believe. For some reason, Christian conservatives take this to be an attack on religion when they’re free to worship as they see fit. They just can’t force others to do so.
I have a question for all these fundamentals. Do you think that not making something mandatory will force people to do it? Will making gay marriage legal make us gay? Will allowing others to practice their faith and not feel persecuted make them leave Christianity?
Actually… that may be it.
Church attendance has dropped in recent decades. At the same time, religious fervor has increased. It’s the death throes of a wounded, dying animal. As secularism and multiculturalism take hold, religious bigots see that behavior they once saw as taboo is becoming accepted and their fear they may give in to their own urges. Maybe they really don’t believe and make religious claims out of social pressure. Maybe they want out. Maybe they’re really gay and that self-hatred gets projected.
Maybe they’re just idiots. Actually, this reminds me of when Hannity was appalled that liberals had the audacity to speak out and fight back against conservatives. If these religious idiots are right, the atheists are going to spend an eternity in hellfire. What el
Whatever the case may be, they’ll lose in the end. With that being said, enjoy the weekend, I’ll see you Monday, and stay tuned. “Élves With Shotguns” will premier as soon as it gets the go-ahead from RPGNow.
It seems that Star Wars: The Old Republic, the latest Star Wars video game, will allow players to enter into homosexual relationships as part of the plot. That’s great! In a modern world where many young people have embraced the idea of gay marriage and gay relationships, it makes sense to give that part of the fan base and population an opportunity to be themselves, even if it is in a world of turbolasers and lightsabers.
Of course, you know what this means?
Star Wars is going to make your kids gay. I know, I know. But now, to my eternal delight, someone has summoned the poor, innocent children. Won’t someone think of the children?!
By the way, the group that is protesting this? It’s the same group that called for a boycott of Girl Scout Cookies. The Family Research Council really has a knack for going after things that are trying to help children or just provide entertainment. I love how they’ve got their tighty-whities in a knot over the possibility of kids seeing a digital gay couple that won’t be able to do anything besies announce its gay and they don’t bat an eyelid over the fact that, in a Star Wars game, starships filled with hundreds or even thousands of people get blown out of the sky on a regular basis. There’s also the little fact that you can have a high Dark Side score by committing questionable acts.
This is what I love about anyone spinning like a top over something like a gay character in a game somehow corrupting the youth. Said critics never seem to be worried about the MASS MURDER going on in video games. It might be the sci-fi aspect, and it’s not like people didn’t complain about killing and guns in games like Grand Theft Auto. But add sex to the equation?
It’s like yelling Frau Blücher. Somewhere, a horse is going to bray.
However, Perry is about as honest as he is pro-gay.
Students are not being banned from celebrating Christmas. Schools are moving celebrations to afterschool activities so as not to cut into precious classroom time. Trust me. Every minute counts when you have to teach kids. It’s a matter of priorities. What is more important for children? Getting to sing Christmas carols during school or actually getting an education and having the party AFTER school?
Kids are NOT being banned from celebrating Christmas. The school has no authority over what religion they practice outside of the classroom, but the school DOES have a responsibility to teach children. And guess what? You CAN pray in school. Oh yes. If a school ever banned someone from praying, it would get in trouble with the ACLU and the whole alphabet soup. The thing conservatives are mad about is the ban on school SPONSORED prayer.
A school can’t make children pray or participate in religious-themed activities any more Congress can make its members start the day with prayer.
And it’s illegal. So are religious tests for public office, but that hasn’t stopped some states, including my own, from having them.
The War on Christmas should be renamed the “War for Christmas.” Conservatives want to make sure everyone follows their own brand of Christianity because if other faiths are allowed, that means NO one will want to be Christian, right? It’s kind of how making abortion legal made every woman want to get an abortion. Or how making same-sex marriage legal suddenly turned everyone gay in a couple of states.
Just remember this. Whenever a conservative wines about a war on religion or awar on Christmas or Halloween or anything like that, it’s because conservatives have a very weird mind-set. If something is legal, then it must be mandatory. It’s why they’re so scared of gay marriage. Rick Perry seems to think gay sex will be mandatory and he won’t be able to put up a Christmas tree if the liberals get their way.
Hey, Perry? We’re okay with you celebrating Christmas. And you don’t have to have gay sex. Just, for the love of all things good and decent, shut the fuck up.
This will very likely be the last Divine by Zero until August. We’re moving and still need to pack a lot of stuff. Plus, looks like I’ve got another class to teach next week, so time is going to be tight.I will however be posting the Weekly Muse story on Sunday and the new poll will go up on Monday. This will overlap for the rest of the feature’s run.
Well, let’s get started, shall we?
Want to know how to build your own Wall-E? Here you go.
The images of newly web gay couples in New York are touching and a testament to the power of love. Way to go, folks!
Michelle Bachmann does not support gays. At all. Her district has actually implemented measures to even make it impossible to help the victims of gay bullying. The result? Her home state has to deal with a rash of teen suicides because she and her ilk are too conservative to reach out and help others.